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October 18, 2010 / milesandhisfavorites

Urban Jungle: Chapter One

My name is Will Disret, and I have the greatest imagination in my school.  Anything, in my mind, can turn the most ordinary thing into a monster-filled adventure.  And this is my story.


“Yaaauuuugh!” screamed two dozen very nerdy, very short kids as they stampeded through the hallways.  Each of them carried a trumpet, or maybe a flute.  And two dozen very tall, very muscular kids were chasing them.  The school’s top bullies.  In pursuit was a single man in a dark green track suit.  The vice principal.  If we turned this school’s pecking order into a food chain, here’s how it would go:

  1. Top Predator: Vice Principal
  2. Common Predator: Bully
  3. Top Prey: Band Geek

That got me thinking.  What if this school’s pecking order really WAS a food chain?  That’s when my imagination took over, and everything went green.

When I came to, I was in a different world.  It looked exactly like the school hallway, but the school hallway didn’t have a dense forest canopy, or hall trees everywhere you looked.  I heard the loud blast of a bugle, and turned to find a very strange herd of creatures stampeding towards me.  They looked like the band geeks, but were as big as horses, with scaly skin and elephant feet that forced them to walk on four legs.  Upon each of their heads was a bony woodwind or brass instrument.  And they were charging faster than a monster truck-straight at me.

I hit the dirt fast.  Their powerful feet nearly trampled me, but I managed to roll out of the way before I was crushed.  That’s when I saw what they were running from.  There were five of them, each one twenty feet tall.  They had paws for hands and feet, and they wore deeply tanned leather jackets.  Their heads were human, but with horrid black eyes, sharp fangs and really long goldenrod hair.  They were like a cross between bully and lion.  Then I realized that they were.

I jumped into a patch of big shrubs in ceramic pots, and the bully-lions passed, chasing the band geeks.  I heard a terrifying screech, and I looked up to see a horrifying beast.  It was humanoid, but had dark green scaly skin and huge bat-like wings with claws on the ends.  It’s arms were short, but had three sharp claws for fingers.  It’s legs were long, with talons for feet.  It was a vice-principal dragon.  And it was looking right at me.

It swooped in, screeching the whole time.  Realizing that I couldn’t hide any longer, I jumped out from the shrubs and made a break for it.  I looked behind me, only to see the dragon in pursuit.  I heard a familiar bugle cry, and I saw the band geeks and bullies charging each other at an intersecting hallway.  And that’s when I got an idea.  I dove towards the ground, hitting the tiled floor and sliding into the middle of the oncoming collision.  The dragon joined me, pinning me down with one of his talons.  Just when the band geeks and bullies, were about to collide, I kicked the dragon in the shins, knocking him to the ground and propelling me out of the way.

Slam!  Crash!  Groan!  Growl!  The noises echoed in my ears even after I slid into the wall.  The band geeks and bullies had collided, forming a cloud of thick dust.  All I could see was tanned leather, shiny brass instruments and the occasional green scaly skin.  Just then, a bully staggered out of the massacre, and started running towards me.  Then, a sharp, curved talon flew out of the dust cloud and struck the bully straight in the back.  He exploded in a pile of pink detention slips.  In the middle was a pen, which smacked me in the forehead and knocked me out.

When I came to again, I had been cornered by three bullies.  They raised their fists, but when they brought them back down, each one had a pink detention slip in it.  They moaned and sank to the ground, helpless.  They writhed and thrashed on the floor, leaving me to escape without harm.  Never underestimate the power of the vice principal.

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