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January 2, 2011 / milesandhisfavorites

Familia Crazia: Viral Vendetta

(scene is family room)

(Mom and Dad are watching a viral video)

Mom: This video is hilarious, isn’t it?

Dad: You’re telling me!

Mom: Let’s give it five stars!

(Miles emerges from dining room)

Miles: 400, 405, yep, 405 stars so far!

(laugh track)

Mom: Excuse me!  Your father and I were watching a hilarious viral video!

Dad: Yeah!  And we would have finished it, too, if it weren’t for our meddling child!

(laugh track)

Miles: You’ve got ten seconds before it’s over.

(Mom and Dad turn their attention back to the screen)

(laugh track)

(theme song)

(scene is backyard)

(Miles and Eli are sitting on a bench)

Miles: Mom and Dad are addicted to that viral video.

Eli: Yeah, what does Bubble Baby have that we don’t?

Miles: Bubbles and a lot less years.

(laugh track)

Eli: I bet if we made our own hit viral video, we could bring Mom and Dad back to reality!

(Miles pulls out cell phone and types in a phone number)

Miles: Hey, listen, Chad?  I’m gonna need bubble bath and some anti-aging cream.

(laugh track)

(scene is kiddie pool)

(Eli is in pool while Miles is filming)

Eli: Why do I have to be the baby?

Miles: Because you used up all of that anti-aging cream!

(laugh track)

Miles: Besides, I would never swim around in a baby pool while tossing bubbles at the camera!

Eli: Neither would I!

Miles: The alternative is a parody of Guy Jumping Off Of Mount Everest.

Eli: Yeah, that one didn’t go so well.

(laugh track)

Miles: You should have seen Guy Jumping Off Of Mount Everest 2: Helicopters!

(laugh track)

Eli: Let’s just get this over with.

Miles: Three, two, one, action!

(Eli begins to jump around in pool)

(bubbles foam up and start to engulf Eli)

(laugh track)

Eli: Help!  Help me!

Miles: Another reason not to be the baby-that was Fast-Growing Bubble Bath!  Chad picked it up at Blobfest!

(laugh track)

Eli: When I get my hands on you, I’ll… I’ll… first get this stuff off me!

(laugh track)

Miles: Maybe we can negotiate.

Eli: You’re UN certified!

(laugh track)

Miles: How do you think science class time was expanded?

(laugh track)

Eli: Fine.  I’ll pay you ten bucks!

Miles: Fifteen-deal!

(laugh track)

Eli: Wait, I didn’t, darn it!

(laugh track)

(Miles takes our hairdryer and blows bubbles off Eli)

Eli: Fifteen dollars for anti-bubble treatment!

(Mom and Dad walk over to pool)

Mom: That was the funniest thing I have ever seen!

Eli: What?  Bubble Baby?

Dad: No, Bubble Brother!

Miles: Er, um, there’s something I need to tell you, Eli.

Eli: What?

Miles: I put what we just did live on the Internet.

Eli: So that means…?

(laugh track)

Miles: Everybody who has a computer just saw you prance around tossing bubbles everywhere.

(laugh track)

Eli: Wait, I’m lost-is that good or bad?

Miles: Good in the fact that we got Mom and Dad away from that video, bad in the fact that I promised a remake of Guy Jumping Off Of Mount Everest.

(laugh track)

(Miles pulls out cell phone)

Miles: Hey, listen, Chad?  Can you get us some tickets to Tibet and extra medical insurance?

(laugh track)

THE END

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One Comment

Leave a Comment
  1. Donald / Jan 8 2011 3:42 am

    Wow – You may have a bright future as a screen writer. That kept on the edge of my seat to see what was going to happen next. Someone call Selena Gomez and see if she is ready to become a big star working on a Miles Kwiatek production.

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