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November 5, 2011 / milesandhisfavorites

MAHF Magazine: Issue 6




I’m thinking that Commercialreality, the miniseries taking place in a world where commercials are real, will be postponed, at least until I have a little less off of my plate.  But-here’s the good news-it’ll be replaced by the epic virtual reality adventure, Sporeality!  The plot is this: a middle school kid who is what you might call a computer geek gets emailed by Maxis (the company that makes the game Spore, along with the famous Sims games), and is asked to beta test a new Spore game.  So, he accepts, and is mailed a weird gadget that looks like a pair of headphones.  But when he follows the instructions that come with them, he finds himself launched into Spore via virtual reality, and has to team up with a couple other Maxis geeks to fight off a disgruntled Maxis employee that wants to shut down global communications.  Join the trio as they travel through every imaginable Spore scenario, from a deadly obstacle course to a crime-ridden worldwide city.  How awesome does that sound?

Before we do the second article, I’d like to say a few words about… no, not the Great Pumpkin, but the aesthetic of Abandoned.  I mean, in The Tribe, you have all these different chaotic groups duking it out for control of a city.  But many of the tribes in Abandoned are far more organized.  That’s sort of because when you look at New York City, it’s definitely not neat and tidy, but there’s an underlying society to it that anyone can understand.  It makes sense that the next generation of people living in this city wouldn’t behave very differently.  Okay, I’m done!  Now, for this next article, let’s have a look at the vilest, sickest, most twisted villains from The Tribe.  Enjoy!  Counting down from partly harmless to lock up your women, here are the worst five bad guys!

Tribe #5: Tribe Circus.

Fear Factor: 4.

Why?: If there’s any reason to fear the Tribe Circus, it’s the fact that their leader, Top Hat, is all insane.  Tribe Circus is made up of clowns, pyromaniacs, and other villainous carnies.  They only appeared in a couple of episodes, but like any good circus would do, they went out with a (non-literal) bang.

Tribe #4: Demon Dogs.

Fear Factor: 8

Why?: These guys come in large numbers, and being nomadic, you can never tell where you’ll find them.  Take the very first episode of The Tribe, for instance.  The Locos (another tribe that I’ll get to in a second) run into them while chasing some soon-to-be major characters.  There’s an awkward/dramatic confrontation moment, and then the two tribes clash.  Kudos to you, Demon Dogs, for being terrifyingly unpredictable.

Tribe #3: The Chosen.

Fear Factor: 9.

Why?: The Chosen made their debut in Series 2, and continued to rule all through Series 3.  The reason to fear them, besides their psychotic need to worship the dead leader of the Locos, Zoot?  Their tactics are brutal: they nearly blew up a shopping mall, but were punked by a guy dressed as Zoot, one of the tensest, yet funniest, moments in tribal history.

Tribe #2: The Locos

Fear Factor: 10

Why?: The Locos were the original rulers of the city, causing chaos and patrolling on a tricked-out police car (Sound familiar?).  Their leaders, Zoot and Ebony, could usually be found shouting aboard the car, chasing stray kids through the streets.  However, when Zoot was killed, and Ebony joined the main tribe of the series, the Mall Rats, the Locos pretty much fell apart.

So, what could be worse than these guys?  Well, the most evil tribe ever to grace the television screen is…

Tribe #1: The Technos

Fear Factor: 10 (+10, 000)

Why?: The Locos, although evil and mean, wouldn’t last five minutes against the Technos.  These guys are something else.  They have wrist-mounted laser guns that can kill, long-distance communication devices, and can even fly airplanes.  How do you think they got to the city?  Their leader, Ram, is the partial inspiration for Tock, the leader of an evil, time-obsessed tribe called the Timekeepers, which I plan to be our third villain story arc in Abandoned.

Okay, time for the third and final article, but how can you top virtual reality and merciless antagonists?  With a preview paragraph from the next episode of Abandoned, of course!  Ahem…

The trio of Moles crept outside the doors, keeping a careful eye on the guards.  Then, without warning, they struck.  The guards didn’t even have time to shout before they were unconscious.  Stun, not kill.  That had been Martina’s orders.  She wanted hostages, so hostages she would get.  They walked through the doors, but a quick EMP shot and the motion detectors were down.  Everybody was asleep.  So, the guards wandered around, to Population Block L.  They approached a little shack, basically just blankets thrown across an aisle.  Pathetic.  The guards pulled out some burlap sacks, damp with chloroform.  They lunged into the shack, took the resident pair by surprise, and knocked them out with the chemical.  Nobody would ever know, until they woke up.  But by then, the Moles would be long gone.  Abel and Leil were now prisoners of the enemy.

Pretty, sweet, eh?  Stay tuned!


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